What does it mean to turn 30? or better yet, what valuable life lessons have I learned in 30 years?

If I truly answered the question I would probably never end this post, so I will keep it to my top five.

1. Without a relationship with God, whatever that may look like to you, life is not as good. I’ve known this to be the case for a long time, but never has it been more real for me than this year. My Father has taken me by the hand on many, many nights and walked me out of dark places, showing me the light that was so difficult for me to see. He has shown me unconditional love, hope and opened my eyes to beautiful things we miss from being caught up in our every day lives. What I have come to learn and would like to share on this topic, is a relationship with God is simply talking to him like you do your best friend. All you have to do is open your heart and be completely sincere. He is not intrusive, he will only come in if you allow him to. He is patient. He will wait.

2. Nothing makes you exempt to the possibility of bad situations, but you can’t let those possibilities prevent you from moving forward in life. After experiencing the death of my daughter, and knowing the chance of it happening to me (1 in 10,000), life dimmed a little for me. I was scared, hesitant about day to day things, and looked upon life with weary eyes. My daughter has taught me that’s not a good way to look at life. We spent the best 8 days of our lives together, cuddling to no end and being any normal mother and daughter. These days in my home were just like everyone else’s. Emme didn’t live her days hesitant of life and what it would bring. She spent her days loving me and getting to know everything about her mama. This is how I have chosen to live my life moving forward. There are always going to be things that don’t go as planned. Mourn them. Mourn them all your life, if you would like, that’s ok, but grow from them. Be stronger. Be braver. And smile when all you can do is cry.

3. Love big. Z has never liked it when I make comments about loving like it’s your last day on earth, but deep love like that is necessary. Your babies can feel it, your family can feel it, your partner can feel it…in fact, everyone can feel it. Your home will be warmer and love will enter your home simply because you give it. Moreover, your children will become adults that can love and be loved.

4. Forgiveness. You must be able to forgive and let go. There is no point to forgiving and keeping a grudge. It will rot inside and eventually show its ugly colors. Forgiving will also make you a happier person, even if the person who hurt you should be the one asking for forgiveness. Although difficult to do, you will feel so good about it after. I promise.

5. Be relentless. In anything you want in life, be it your family, work, spiritual life, personal growth, don’t give up. There will always be obstacles, some will even knock you out with their hopelessness but let me tell you, there is always light where darkness seems to reign. Always.

This year has been a rough year for me, to say the least, but hope can never be crushed. I thank the Lord for the unforeseen and for the things I do not understand. For the things to come and for those that came and left too soon. I thank him for the undeniable strength he has given me every day so I am able to mourn with grace. Death will not overcome.