I was sitting on my down filled couch, snuggled between the seats, where my body will normally sink down as the couch swallow me in. It’s my favorite spot, but not conducive to getting any work done. As my eyelids became 30 pound weights, I fought hard to channel the caffeine I had consumed hours earlier. It wasn’t working. And as I started snoozing, I realized I had not written my Matron of Honor speech!

I jumped up, sat up, pulled the blankets off, pulled my computer and got to work. After a couple seconds, I turned around and asked Eric: Why didn’t you remind me to write my speech? Of course, I needed someone to blame. lol. He calmly paused his video game head set, looked over at me, and responded : I knew it wasn’t going to be hard for you, so I figured you would get to it when you had time.

Fair.

And today I am reflecting on what I should take out, because instead of a speech, I have a novel. Sigh.

I love my little sister more than words can describe. I don’t want to make our guests cry, but I also don’t want to have everyone laughing so hard they pee their pants. So, what to take out?

Should I take out the part where I vividly remember Dini learning how to walk? As she tumbled from side to side, like a little person who did one too many twisty turns. Her little white skirt, with a 3 rainbow zig-zag design flipping up and down from the slight breeze of that morning back in 1991. Joy filled my brother and I as we took off running after her, assuring she wouldn’t fall over and get hurt. Her giggles filled our hearts with endless love, as they continue to fill us with joy now, although those giggles are now full out laughter.

Or the multiple times her friends came searching for me at school (we went to a K-12th grade school), to let me know my little sister needed me, because believe it or not, she was very feisty and got into some trouble. Whether it was she needed help with a friend, or had fallen and gotten hurt, I was the person they came to to rescue her.

Or should I take out the part where she and my sister said goodbye to me in Berkeley, knowing our lives were changing, and as much as it was difficult for them to leave without me, they didn’t cry, so I wouldn’t cry anymore than I already was. Always supporting me and pushing me forward.

My sisters (and my brother ) have always been my golden joinery. They are the tree sap lacquer dusted with gold, used to fill me when needed. They are my parents greatest gift to me.

So, not sure I decided what I am going to take out, but oh boy! I hope I stick to my time and can run through it without making an ugly crying face. To wedding joy 🙂

XO